I’mMeasurable

I don’t struggle for words, and I love to write; but my biggest weakness with writing and talking is not being able to fully communicate how much I want too. Pull the plug on your shallow mouth and the sink is empty fast. Now pull the plug on a full bath and that’s the feeling. I need to use 10 words to explain 1 feeling, because it’s not possible to completely get across what I want to without all 10 complimenting the other. If I can’t do it in words, I do it in actions and keep my mouth closed. Some words aren’t deep enough- maybe it’s because they’ve been washed out in movies and by the wrong people; so I add more or choose metaphors to explain it with greater meaning, personalised, or with actions- even subtle ones that can go missed. Just like good branding – the message is always the same, across all outlets.

There ARE some feelings that have no words. It’s more of a question, that is measured in simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’. Basically, you feel it or you don’t. No in-between you bad fool, I don’t buy that at all. No such thing as a ‘maybe’ with this feeling. You can’t measure it, you can’t understand it entirely- you just kind’ve get it or you don’t. It’s like what is shown in movies and books, but your own- it’s like a ‘relaxing happiness that excites you with curiosity and comfort simultaneously’ (10 words).  It energises you to stay up late when you have to get up early. There are no words to express it properly, and to each person, the same answer means different results. Insanity.

So with these simple yet complex unmeasurable feelings that different words can mean to different people (try and keep up), what does that mean for ‘actions’? Do some minor actions mean more to other people, based on all these unmeasurable variables? YES, YES IT DOES.

I had two coffees today, which is insignificant in a greater scheme, and pretty much every scheme ever and ever. They were delicious and I loved it and they made me feel good though. So maybe that isn’t insignificant at all. Little cups of joy.

But some people hate coffee.

I saw a homeless guy I always see around town walking his bike, and I knew what he was going to say before he even said it.

“Do you please have a spare $3.50?”

I don’t know why he’s always so specific, but it’s always $3.50. One day I had a pocket full of coins and I avoided him like an absolute plague. He’s knocked on my window when I’ve been sitting in my car before. I’ve seen him go to everyone on a street and get nothing. Man that was guilt. I cleared my conscience from it and chased him like he chased others, which is pretty low on my behalf (I really shouldn’t of needed the reminder). I wonder what gives him that ‘spoilt’ good feeling, that can occur from anything. That first sip of beer on a Friday at 5pm. I couldn’t tell you, but I hoped it existed, just like I do for everyone. The key is when you truly care for someone, and you have that ‘immeasurable’ feeling about them, you’ll find yourself chasing it from them, and wanting to fill them with these small moments all the time. Usually you get it simply from hearing them or seeing them. Big gestures are just that, and measurable in so many variables, usually money, planning and effort. But the small ones are like the coffees. They make today better. The immeasurable actions, that make immeasurable feelings based on the individual. Chase them, learn them, and spread them.

I gave him $2, he nodded and walked away. I think the consistent rejection has made him cold even to small warm gestures.

What you can definitely measure – You don’t need gold teeth to bite the poor.

Johnny Cash, when asked for his definition of paradise.

“This morning, with her, having coffee.“

C.f